Soap Opera Uncensored: Issue 10 Read online

impossibly brought Morgan to new acting heights. Y&R is very lucky to have Morgan on its canvas.

  Hillary B. Smith, Venice: As much as we love Smith’s Nora on One Life, it’s her scene-stealing work on Venice as Guya that has us addicted. Not to be outdone, Smith is giving Scott a run for her boozy money!

  Worst Male Performances in a Storyline:

  Barret Helms as Baz, One Life: The arrogant Helms came in thinking he was a star when he was nothing more than a hair model. Thank you, One Life, for firing this kid’s ass.

  Daniel Goddard as Caleb, Y&R: We love Goddard’s underrated work as Cane, but the Aussie had us laughing as Cane pretended to be his psychotic brother, Caleb, who looked more constipated that evil. It’s not his fault: Goddard had no idea who he was actually playing, so we blame the writers.

  Worst Female Performances in a Storyline:

  Genie Francis, Y&R: Who doesn’t love this Emmy winner? However, Francis proved any great actor can suck just as a bad as a bad actor. While she’s improving, Francis should be ashamed for chewing the scenery with her over-the-top portrayal of Cane’s protective Mama. Hopefully, Francis will pay for Tristan Rogers’ reconstructive lip surgery!

  Vanessa Marcil Giovinazzo, GH: Yes, we don’t blame the Emmy winner for being pissed over her shitty comeback storyline, but she could have at least infused her lazy, paralyzed performance with just a tad of energy to ease our pain.

  And here’s the rest of our self-explanatory best-and-worst list:

  Best Storyline:

  The Two Todds, One Life

  Worst Storyline:

  Anything Dena Higley wrote on DAYS

  Most Contemporary/Entertaining/Funniest Storyline:

  Fraternity Row is cancelled/Roxy’s soap fantasy, One Life

  Most Vile Storyline:

  Will Robin die of AIDS? GH

  Best Plot Twist:

  Todd and Victor are twins, One Life

  Worst Plot Twist:

  Chloe becomes a hooker, DAYS

  Most Surprising Plot Twists: One Life

  Gigi is alive

  —tie— Stacy has Gigi’s face

  —tie— Todd murdered Victor

  —tie— Matthew flat lines and dies; returns from the dead

  —tie— Irene is alive

  —tie— Frat Row is cancelled!

  Most Unbelievable and Contrived Plot Twist:

  Caleb — not Cane — was killed, Y&R

  Most Overused Plot Device:

  Doppelgangers, DAYS/One Life/Y&R

  Most Disgusting/Worst Plot Device:

  Robin’s HIV-infected blood used as weapon, GH

  Best Prop:

  Soap Opera Weekly on One Life

  Worst Prop:

  The volcano, Y&R

  Worst Set:

  Y&R’s prison/police station

  Best Gimmick:

  Talking Liam and Little David Vickers, One Life

  Best Gay Character:

  Sonny Kiriakis, DAYS

  Most Contrived Gay Character:

  Marissa Chandler, AMC

  Best Use of History:

  DAYS 2.0

  —tie—One Life

  Worst Use of History:

  GH

  Best Firing:

  Dena Higley, DAYS

  Worst Firings:

  Lexi Ainsworth and Becky Herbst, GH

  Best Cameos:

  Alexa Havens, Josh Duhamel, Sarah Michelle Gellar, Eva La Rue, Julia Barr, AMC

  Breakout Star — Female:

  Mama Bjorlin, Dirty Soap

  Breakout Star — Male:

  JR Martinez, AMC/Dancing With The Stars

  Biggest Real-Life Heroes:

  Soap fans and Catherine Hickland

  Biggest Real-Life Douchebag:

  Brian Frons, ABC Daytime President

  Best Line:

  “Frankly, Erica, I don’t give a damn!”

  —Jack, AMC

  Worst Line:

  “I miss you like air,”

  —Marlena to John, DAYS

  Wittiest Character:

  Adam Newman, Y&R

  Dumbest Characters:

  Angelina, Y&R

  —tie— Sharon Newman, Y&R

  Best Decision:

  DAYS’s reboot

  Worst Decision:

  Cancelling AMC and One Life

  Best Male Recast:

  Jacob Young, B&B

  Worst Male Recasts:

  Tom Degnan, One Life

  —tie— Patrick Muldoon, DAYS

  Best Female Recast:

  Debbi Morgan as Harmony, Y&R

  Worst Female Recasts:

  Tamara Braun/Natalia Livingston, DAYS

  Best Temporary Female Recast:

  Michael Learned as Katherine, Y&R

  Best Temporary Male Recast:

  Kin Shriner as Jeffrey, Y&R

  Most Pointless Recast:

  Andrew Trischitta replacing Carmen Le Porto as Jack Manning, One Life

  Best New Male Character:

  Cutter Wentworth, One Life

  Best New Female Character:

  Madison James, DAYS

  Worst New Character:

  Delores, GH

  Most Boring Character:

  Sam, Y&R

  Best Nicknames:

  “Scarface,” One Life

  —tie— Step Nora, One Life

  Worst Trend:

  Crappy reality shows replacing soaps