Soap Opera Uncensored: Issue 30 Read online

  *the ranking is exactly the same for the 25-54 demo, except the actual numbers are different, and GH is still beating THE VIEW even in 25-54 demo.

  Once again, Brian Frons was wrong in his USA TODAY article last May. Soaps are not just "baby boomer" programs. Soaps are thus far winning May Sweeps in the advertisers' target demographic. 

  Also, thus far, in May Sweeps, GH more than doubles the female teens demo of every other show across the daytime landscape, including all of CBS, ABC, NBC, (except for the 2nd half hour of LET’S MAKE A DEAL. GH is in well ahead of 2nd half hour of LET’S MAKE A DEAL, but not by double as it is with all the rest of daytime.) 

  THE YOUNG AND THE RESTLESS — The Fall of Genoa City!

  • Is this good or bad news for Tucker? Last week, Eileen Davidson tweeted the following: “Last week I lost my childcare. This week I lost my job! It all works out because I don't need a babysitter if I'm not working. #beingpositive.” As hinted in the new DIGEST, the popular, talented and gorgeous actress is already on the radar over at DAYS, who insiders report want to bring her back as Kristen Blake (and Susan Banks?), a role she played from 1993-98.

  One of Davidson’s Y&R co-stars tells UNCENSORED: “Apparently, she’s going back to DAYS. That’s all I know. No one knows why she was let go. There had to be some kind of arrangement between Sony, DAYS and Y&R unless it’s money, but let’s face it: there are about 15 actors who need to be fired before Davidson.” I’d say.

  As for Tucker, it seems like Stephen Nichols will continue to have story… for the time being without Ashley on the canvas.

  As much as I love Davidson on Y&R, I think DAYS could use her talents more than the CBS soap opera. Though it will require a stretch of the imagination when watching Davidson play James Scott’s mother. And with EJ’s paternity being retconned, now is the perfect time for Kristen and company to return to Salem. Let’s pray DAYS doesn’t screw this comeback up like it did with Crystal Chappell’s and Lisa Rinna’s.

  • More newbies: Lindsay Bushman will make her debut as Phyllis and Nick's daughter on Friday, June 8, followed by Max Ehrich, playing Lauren and Michael's son, on Monday, June 11. Looks like these kids are headed for a romance, which could provide some organic conflict for friends Michael and Phyllis.

  • Appearances matter: Y&R’s new opening sequence should air in the next two to three weeks, reports an insider. Whoohoo. There is some worry that Y&R is keeping its original sequence, just updating the faces. Regardless, most if not all of the cast, have already been filmed for their hair-flicking moments. More soon.

  • The fans have been heard: The latest on the despised coupling of Shictor is that Y&R is ending the maligned storyline… but they’ve taped about a month or so of vomit-inducing material. Victor and Sharon’s romance equals box office poison! And for all us Shit-or fans, here’s their official new love song (seriously; and it’s good): mazetrain.com/yr/shictor.mp3

  • I miss Jess Walton already. That is all.

  • Emmy winner Jennifer Landon will assume the role of Heather this summer! That sound you hear? The former WORLD TURNS starlet clearing room on her mantle for a fourth statuette.

  • Spotted Scribe: Current B&B breakdown writer Kay Alden (and real William Bell protégé) was seen on the Y&R set recently… but don’t jump for joy; she’s not sniffing for her old job back.

  • Sally Sussman Morina tells UNCENSORED that she just finished up a gig on Josh Griffith and Jill Farren Phelps new telenovela for Nick at Nite, HOLLYWOOD HEIGHTS. “It was fun,” she tells me. Now get your ass back to, Y&R, damn it.

  According to folklore, apparently the reason the Bells refuse to welcome back Morina is because she broke Bill Bell’s heart when she departed Y&R to create her own soap opera, GENERATIONS. Seriously? Really? That was a million years ago — and last time I checked, Bell Sr. did the same to Irna Phillips! Freakin’ egos are destroying this business. The industry is stuck in the past and refuses to move on, which is why it’s dying. You know how they say you never emotionally age after being sexually abused as a child — and that you remain the emotional age when the abuse began? Yep, that’s what happened to soaps, too. They all still think it’s 1989.

  SOAP MEME

  TEN SHADES OF CONFUSION: TOP 10 WAYS TO SAVE Y&R!

  1. Fire co-head writers Hogan Sheffer and Scott Hamner.

  2. Re-hire Emmy winners Sally Sussman Morina and Jack Smith as co-head writers; make Brad Bell Y&R’s executive producer; Maria, costume designer.

  3. Back-burner Eric Braeden.

  4. Front-burner Michael Muhney.

  5. Bring back Paul Rauch as co-executive producer.

  6. Fire half the cast.

  7. Hire a good script editor so the show flows naturally.

  8. Write a fantastic B&B-Y&R crossover storyline, Bill Bell-style.

  9. Bring back Kimberlin Brown, Stacy Haiduk to retcon this Daisy mess!

  10. Salvage the Sharon Newman character (good luck)!

  SOAP OPERA MYSTERY HOUR

  This week’s hottest blind item

  • Which Emmy-nominated actress will be reprising her role very soon?

  THE IDIOT RATINGS: April 30-May 4

  Winner: B&B!

  Loser: Y&R! DAYS!

  *Courtesy of Soap Opera Network

  (Compared to Last Week/Compared to Last Year)

  Week of April 30 – May 4, 2012

  NOTE: Please do not copy and paste the entire ratings. Thank you.

  Numbers are based on Live+Same Day ratings

  (Compared to Last Week/Compared to Last Year)

  Total Viewers

  1. Y&R 4,293,000 (-152,000/-250,000)

  2. B&B 3,111,000 (+73,000/+288,000)

  3. GH 2,408,000 (+53,000/+29,000)

  4. DAYS 2,331,000 (-52,000/+92,000)

  Households

  1. Y&R 3.2/11 (-.1/-.1)

  2. B&B 2.3/8 (same/+.3)

  3. DAYS 1.8/6 (same/+.1)

  3. GH 1.8/6 (same/same)

  Women 18-49 Viewers

  1. Y&R 851,000 (-22,000/-85,000)

  2. B&B 722,000 (+37,000/+188,000)

  3. GH 625,000 (+66,000/-36,000)

  4. DAYS 508,000 (-18,000/-143,000)

  Women 18-49 Rating

  1. Y&R 1.3/9 (-.1/-.1)

  2. B&B 1.1/8 (same/+.3)

  3. GH 1.0/6 (+.1/same)

  4. DAYS 0.8/5 (same/-.2)

  Every Week!

  FEARLESS PREDICTIONS

  What Will Happen? Who Will Die? Who Knows?

  UNCENSORED looked into our crystal balls to forecast the future of your favorite stories and characters.

  THE BOLD AND THE BEAUTIFUL

  • Rick Forrester is named the new host of DRAG RACE!

  GENERAL HOSPITAL

  • Ron Carlivati is arrested for shooting one of his Twitter followers!

  DAYS OF OUR LIVES

  • Susan buries Marlena alive!

 

  THE YOUNG AND THE RESTLESS

  • Victor seduces Summer: “She was ate before she was seven,” quips Michael.

  • Sharon falls in love with Murphy. “I own stock in Viagra,” smirks Sharon.

  SOAP PORN: Next Week's Soapgasms

  Can’t watch all the soaps this week? No worries — here’s a cheat sheet!

  Top Shows to Watch:

  1. THE BOLD AND THE BEAUTIFUL

  2. GENERAL HOSPITAL

  3. DAYS OF OUR LIVES

  Top Storylines to Watch:

  1. The L Word, B&B

  2. Too Wong Foo, Rick Forrester, B&B

  3. 50 Shades of Cricket, Y&R

  Top Actresses to Watch:

  1. Crystal Chappell, B&B

  2. Florenica Lozano, GH

  3. Finola Hughes, GH

  4. Robin Mattson, GH

  5. Lauralee Bell, Y&R

 

  Top Actors to Watch:

  1. Michael Muhney, Y&R

  2. Roger Howarth, GH

  3. James Scott, DAYS


  4. Chandler Massey, DAYS

  5. Michael Damian, Y&R

  Top Duos to Watch:

  1. Todd and Téa, GH

  2. Danny and Christine, Y&R

  3. Rick and High Heels, B&B

  Top Couples to Fast-Forward Through:

  1. Sharon and Victor, Y&R

  2. Harmony and Tucker, Y&R

  3. Neil and Sofia, Y&R

  Top Dream Couples:

  1. Cane and Ashley, Y&R

  2. Avery and Michael, Y&R

  3. Bill and Taylor, B&B

  Top New-ish Duos to Watch:

  1. Danielle and Karen, B&B

  2. Chelsea and Adam, Y&R

  3. Anna and Luke, GH

  Top Tweeters:

  1. Finola Hughes: @finolahughes

  2. Michael Muhney: @michaelmuhney

  3. Crystal Chappell: @crystalchappell

  Top Episodes To Watch:

  1. Thursday: Crystal Chappell debuts as Danielle on B&B: “Whoohoo — people actually digest cupcakes on this show!”

  2. Wednesday: Y&R’s Paul turns to Christine for help with Ricky. “Don’t look at me,” says Crickett. “I have no experience dealing with a gay son.”

  3. Wednesday: Ian drugs Brady on DAYS. And then rapes him.

  The next issue of SOAP OPERA UNCENSORED will be out on Monday, May 21, 2012!